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Got caught up in a really good book last night. I didn`t stop coloring till 2 o`clock this morning.
I don`t know what everyone`s complaining about. The economy looks great from my parents` basement.
30 years later and my Cabbage Patch Kid still has no clue that he`s adopted.
Accidentally bought a bag of raw almonds. Turns out I don`t like almonds, I like salt.
Why don’t we just take the safety labels off of everything and let this stupidity problem solve itself?
I would watch NASCAR if it was more like Mario Kart.
Eat whatever you want,and if anyone tries to lecture you about your weight ...Eat them too..!
Women say they love nerds until you whip out your Pokemon cards.
Apparently, when people say "I could use a hand" it doesn`t mean they want to get slapped in the face.
Afraid of not getting what you ordered when online shopping…..Ha, try online dating
Holiday Tip #236: When hosting a covered dish holiday dinner where everyone brings something, never put a skinny person in charge of desserts.
since when was it cool to have an iPhone at the age of 10.. i sincerely hope those parents know what they`ve done.
My relationship is mostly me apologizing for saying something super bada$$ and hilarious
If only someone on the internet would give me their opinion on the election.
Iam not as THINK as you DRUNK iam!!