Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
Life is like chocolate...sometimes you gotta deal with nuts.
Tis the season to throw your diet out the window.
My new years resolution was to lose 30 pounds by the end of summer. I`ve only got 40 pounds to go.
There`s a fine line between flirty and creepy. And that line is called being good looking.
Iām mad, but not as mad as someone asking to see the rules in the middle of a monopoly game.
People are like music, some speak the truth and others are just noise.
I`d be super embarrassed if people saw my google history but only because its all words I should really know how to spell by now
B!tch life isn`t a garden ... So stop being a hoe!
Marriage is supposed to be permanent. It`s like a tattoo that yells at you.
Roses are red, violets are blue, the boss snuck out early, so I left too.
I`d like to thanks all the girls for wearing yoga pants. It is the only reason why we`re not complaining about how cold this winter it
I want to tell my coworker I have strong feelings for her, but I`m afraid things might get weird if she knows I hate her.
Some life lessons are so profound; you only need to do them one time. Putting Icy Hot on my balls, for example ā¦
Cologne - because people shouldn`t have a choice whether or not they want to smell you.
Cheered myself up earlier by putting a "no U-turn" sign in a dead-end street.