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It`s just a mater of time before bathrooms will eventually be called Selfie Rooms
Am I the only one who calculates how much sleep I can get before I go to bed?
Apparently a good way to get asked to leave the gym is to move a treadmill behind a guy on a stationary bike and pretend you`re angrily chasing him.
Don`t just lay there... Move! Bounce! Do something!! ~ me, pleading with my hair
I`ve taken my kids all over the country, but their favorite place to be is still "in the way."
Hey! Did any of you see my........ Oh ! Never mind... :D How much of you said that before? heee heee hee!
There`s a fine line between crazy and free spirited and it`s usually a prescription.
Was the little pig who built his house out of straw some sort of idiot?
Life is simple. Eat. Sleep. Update Facebook status.
Nothing makes me more productive than the last minute.
You could pleasure me just by walking away.
Donald Duck, saying screw you to pants since 1934.
There`s not much more gratifying than seeing a chick who thinks she`s super hot trip on her high heels.
Alcohol – The best night time: slurring, headache, dehydration, drink spilling, charm killing, so you think you can dance “medicine.”
My wife must have some big surprise vacation planned. She left a note by the bed telling me I had until tomorrow to have my bags packed.