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Any question is a hard hitting question when it`s written on a brick and thrown full force at your face.
Remember the good old days when making the “duck face” involved 2 Pringles?
this one time I was in a bush, and this squirrel was like hey, and I was like hey you can`t talk to me your a squirrel and he was like yea I know lmao
If a girls tongue being pierced really mattered, then I would have my palm pierced!
I like to log into facebook and leave a status just to show I`m here. Or am I?
Guys are excellent cooks. With two eggs, a sausage, & a little bit of milk...they can keep a girl`s stomach full for 9 months.
My life has a great cast, but I can’t figure out the plot.
I’m too young to be too old for everything.
to do list: buy a parrot. teach the parrot to say, "Help!! I`ve been turned into a parrot!"
Judging from all the misery and carnage on my newsfeed, I`m assuming it`s Monday.
They say `No news is good news,` but I think it just means I have a lazy paperboy.
I noticed you`re not yourself today. I really like it.
Madonna is 55 her boyfriend is 22. Tina Turner is 75 her boyfriend is 40. JLo is 42 her boyfriend is 26. Still single? Relax. Your boyfriend hasn`t been born yet.
Apparently when your girlfriend says "f*ck that bitch", you`re not supposed to take her seriously.
There are 10 types of people in the world, Those that understand binary, and those who don`t.