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There are no winners the day following a green beer, corned beef, and cabbage binge.
So a year ago today I asked a really beautiful friend out on a date and today I asked her to marry me. She said no both times.
If you drink enough, your brain starts photo-shopping people.
There is a fine line between “hobby” and “mental illness.”
Some days your the bug; some days your the windshield.
Karaoke bars combine two of the worlds greatest evils—people who shouldn`t drink with people who shouldn`t sing.
Its all sh!ts and giggles until someone giggles and sh!ts
Will you go with me to my therapist tomorrow? He thinks I`m making you up.
I`m fat, but I blame my dog for not exercising me enough.
Cats don`t come with instructions, so how is anyone supposed to know you can`t put them in the washing machine.
Easy come, easy go describes my last 12 cases of beer and 17 relationships.
when people fall in love they are called " love birds." when they fight they are called "angry birds."
I`m going to spend Valentine`s day with my ex.... Box 360
1. Denial 2. Anger 3. Bargaining 4. Depression 5. Acceptance – My stages of getting ready for work
I recently added squats to my workouts by moving the beer into the bottom shelf of the fridge.