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Million dollar idea: Duck Dynasty chia pets.
Jesus is coming.... look busy
twinkle twinkle little star ... point me to the nearest bar.
I was thinking about selling my old phone but I think it knows too much.
I socially identify as the guy who tried to jump off of the sinking Titanic but ending up hitting a massive propeller on the way down.
You are on the list of the many things I would do for a Klondike bar.
I`m certain that the reason for Wasps, Hornets, and Yellowjackets was to remind grown men that they can still scream like a little girl.
Why do they have β€œlimited edition” scented candles? Are there crazy people collecting these things?
U still drunk from last night or did u get a new buzz going this morning.
On a scale of 9 to 10, how would you rate me?
exercise........you mean extra fries
If I ever had to run for my life, I would probably die.
I`d like to have a child one day ... Two days, tops.
I’ve yet to be intimidated by a fancy wine list thanks to my vast knowledge of fine wines and my eeny, meeny, miny, moe system.
.Monday: No. Tuesday: Ugh. Wednesday: Why. Thursday: Omg. Friday: Finally. Saturday: Yes. Sunday: Crying.