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"No comment" - said no woman, ever
I know that no means no, but that`s about the extent of my Spanish.
It`s only when you see a mosquito landing on your testicles that you realize that there is always a way to solve problems without using violence.
This one isnt that funny, keep scrolling.
Dating someone based only on looks is so shallow. Consider other things, like, do they have a lot of money.
Girls are like parking spots all the good ones are taken and the rest are to far away
Not now, I`m busy bringing shame to my family on the internet.
If turning alcohol into bad decisions ever becomes an Olympic event, I`m bringin` home the Gold! USA! USA!
My favorite part of seeing someone I know in public is pretending I didn’t.
"This is groundbreaking stuff." - Inventor of the shovel
Can I get likes for no reason?
Nobody expects you to post brilliance. Just be yourself, with the occasional intent of bringing shame to your entire family.
Wow comma I just realized if I tap the microphone on my keyboard I don`t have to type out my statuses anymore exclamation point
If you think this week was a drag, wait till you see what happens next week!
If you really can make $10,000 a month working from home why would anyone take the harder job of nailing those signs to trees?