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*licks finger, holds it up in the air* ah yes, just as I suspected. wind.
I just found out cock fighting is done with roosters and now it feels like this 6 months of training has been wasted.
If you stop at a yellow light I`m going to assume you have something illegal in your car.
I just realized that the only time I`m good at dancing is when I`m about to pee my pants
Apparently a new study shows that unattractive men make better mates. Nice try, ugly scientists.
Your gene pool should be drained, the area bleached & the ground burned & salted. But other than that you seem like a great person.
It would be a lot easier to drink the recommended 64oz of water a day if it was beer.
Of course the Pilgrims had a lot to be thankful for, all their in-laws were back in Europe.
is wondering why books on "how to make women happy" arent displayed in the fiction section
A smile is the same in every language, I`m pretty sure the pee pee dance is too
Dear family, thank you for all those wonderful childhood memories ... Here`s my therapy bill.
When you wear cowboy clothes, are you ranch dressing?
Welcome to Plastic Surgery Addicts Anonymous. I see a lot of new faces in the room this week and I`m very disappointed with all of you.
Boobs are to men what light bulbs are to moths.
The only time that my wife screams my name in bed is when I fart in my sleep.