Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
I purchased my own Taser off the internet the other day. In a totally unconnected incident, I´ve got to buy a cat to replace the neighbors one this afternoon.
Muffins – for people who don’t have the guts to order cake for breakfast.
Whenever I see someone in a Smart Car, I expect to see a kid with a remote control nearby.
I can walk up to any dog, rub its belly and make a friend ... That trick rarely works on people.
If life gives you melons, you might be dyslexic.
Why is there Head & Shoulders shampoo? Who has hair on their shoulders? Who`s shampooing their shoulder hair? ... please come forward.
My husband and I are having a serious fight. Do you think I should let him know about it?
if ever you need NOTHING, im here for you.
I sent that "Ancestry " site some information on my family tree. They sent me back a packet of seeds and suggested that I just start over
sorry abaut the message I sent you last night, my phone was drunk!
Calling all men...Eboli can live up to two months in semen..YES! You better wash your socks.
My New Years resolution is to be more assertive if that`s okay with you guys?
I’m glad we don’t have to hunt for our food any more. I don’t even know where sandwiches live...
I think New York has reached the point where it can finally be called York.
Imagine if trees gave off WiFi signals, We would be planting so many trees. And we`d probably save the planet too! Too bad they only produce the oxygen we breath :/