Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
There’s a limit of how close you should be to another man when taking a selfie.
The average person farts 14 times a day. Finally, I`m above average at something!
I gave my boyfriend a glue stick instead of a Chapstick last weekend, and he`s still not talking to me!
Why do they ask you "Please press 1 for English, then put you with someone who`s accent is so thick you can`t understand them?
That moment when you’re talking to yourself and you smile like an idiot, because you’re just so hilarious.
I use awkward numerical range description anywhere between 13 and 4 times a day.
I’ve been that, done that, had that, lost that, needed that and felt that. Just a few of the many reasons why I always drink to “that”.
I`m sorry if I looked interested. You probably caught me fantasizing about bacon.
Under no circumstances shall a call be made to another male after 2 a.m., unless its to get bailed out of jail.
3 words, 8 letters, easy to say, hard to prove... ..."I`m a zebra."
I need a partner in wine.
Dear Ninja Turtles, Why are you wearing masks? There are no other giant, mutated turtles. No one`s gonna mistake a different turtle for you.
All I need right now is a hug ... And five hundred thousand dollars in cash.
The iPad: Because the iPhone was too small for other people to notice you.