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Who do Walmart shoppers make fun of?
My favorite exercise is a cross between a lunge and a crunch. It’s called Lunch.
I`m not a doctor but I play one on Match.com
By the power vested in me and by this case of beer, I now pronounce these three loads of laundry as one.
PRO TIP: You can use crunchy food to block out conversations of people you hate.
Somedays I feel like running away. Then I remember how much I hate running.
Are you one of those people that get hurt from things posted on Facebook? You can easily avoid that by keeping your a$$ off of Facebook.
If "The Breakfast Club" was made today, it would be a silent film about five kids staring at their phone
The nice thing about being a guy is your underwear only costs $10 for a 3-pack.
If Jimmy cracked corn and no one cares, then why the heck is there a song about it?
You are right when you realize you were wrong.
If you no longer know what day of the week it is, it’s time to get a job.
Instead of going to Starbucks, I like to make my own coffee, yell my name out incorrectly, and then light a $5 bill on fire.
Who called them fake potatoes and not imitaters.
People who weigh their produce. What`s it like to have all the time in the world?