Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
i want a cute boy to let me hold his hand and his credit card
Being rich doesn`t equal happiness but i`d rather cry in a ferrari
If you have to ask if it`s too early to drink wine...You`re an amateur and we can`t be friends.
April Fools Day has been cancelled this year.
I wish there was an observation deck at WalMart.
Relationship status: If I slam on my brakes really hard... The seatbelt hugs me back.
My head says go to the gym. My heart says food.
Judging by the amount of times I accidently cut myself on sharp objects it`s probably just as well real lightsabers aren`t available yet.
I put the b!tch in the kitchen.~ last thing I remember saying before I woke up in the hospital.
I know I`ve had enough to drink when I have to concentrate to blink.
Go ahead, post sober. Ruin everything.
I want to meet the guy whose complaint led to cashiers asking me if it`s okay if they put the receipt in my bag.
Divorce is what happens when two people win an argument.
All my dance moves look like i`m trying to tell the guy on first base to steal second
Hello... Modeling Agency? Ya, my selfie just got 34 likes I think I`m ready to go pro!