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ME: “We have a problem, the liquor store is closed.” HER: “That`s ok, I don’t drink.” ME: “Ok we have two problems.”
I`m the crazy bitch you`ll never forget.
Not all country music is terrible. If you can get past the lyrics about trucks, mud, farms and cows... It`s actually not too bad.
I love you more each day as my other options diminish.
So this guy with a premature ejaculation problem comes out of nowhere.
MAY` contain nudity? Either it does or it doesn`t. DON`T WASTE MY TIME
The trouble with children is that they´re not returnable.
I am not judging you...I already decided I don`t like you
I have a kid in Africa I inoculate, feed, clothe and send to school for only $1 day. It cost a lot to send him over there though.
Orion`s Belt is a huge waist of space.
Screw your recommended serving size. You don`t know me.
I can`t really walk the walk, or talk the talk. But, if you need someone to drink the drink, I`m your man!
Why hasn`t anyone written a sequal song to "Jessie`s Girl" ... Where he discovers what an incredible high maintenance drag she is?
The easiest way for me to lose inches is to switch to the metric system.
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