Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
Love is like Wi-Fi, you can`t see it, but you know when you`ve lost it.
I used to be a class act......or clown,as my 7th grade teacher would tell my parents!!
Whatever you do in life, always give 100%…unless you’re donating blood…
Times change When I was a kid, werewolves and vampires were very scary. Now everyone wants to have sex with them
I was sad, because I had no shoes. Until I met a man that had no feet. So, I took his shoes, cuz hey, he wan`t using them anyway!
never judges a book by its cover. I use the paragraph on the back, it tells you what the story is about.
Me: "I want to travel more." Bank account: "Like, to the park?"
If the waitress in the One Bell Pub is reading this can we please have our pudding now, cheers
I have a million dollar idea that I will share with the first million people to send me a dollar.......
Sometimes it`s easy to forget we would all violently murder each other if we couldn`t obtain basic food or water. Have a great day guys.
I hate driving so much that I even ring for taxis on grand theft auto.
I haven`t seen any new Bigfoot pictures in a while... I hope he`s OK.
Sharks aren’t so bad. If some stranger entered my house wearing only a Speedo, I would probably attack him too.
Sometimes in the morning while drinking my coffee, I think about all the people I will be pissing off.
You know that little thing inside your head that keeps you from saying things you shouldn`t? ... Yeah, I don`t have one of those.