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Apparently when my math teacher asked `what comes after 69` "I DO" was not the correct answer.
Million Dollar Idea: Hire a bunch of people with OCD and start a cleaning company.
"Hello Kitty" should have been a brand of condoms...
They say you are what you eat but what happens if you didn`t mean to eat it. I don`t want to be a bug.
This recliner and I go way back.
Who called them expiration dates instead of spoiler alerts
My new girlfiend is taking forever to exist.
Man cannot live on bread alone ... hence beer and stuff.
Sorry I ordered a salad and then ate all your fries.
The longer I sit in this drive-thru, the more pennies Iām going to pay with.
Some days I just wish I was an octopus, so I could slap eight people at once.
Family and Friends - I am FAR too busy to listen to any of your problems or concerns *Googles do penguins go to heaven?*
Will someone please tell ugly girls with small boobs that their opioion doesnt really matter.
To the individual who sat outside in their car, across the street from our house, at 530 am and had Led Zepplens Immigrant Song blaring at full volume, I have one thing to say to you! AWESOME CHOICE DUDE!!!!!!!
Boobs make me forget about all the bad things in the world.