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I hate it when the movie trailer is better than the movie itself.
I feel like the majority of Eminem`s songs are just him reading from his diary with angry background music.
Touch it gently, put two fingers inside, if it`s wide use three fingers, make sure it`s wet and rub up and down. Yep that`s how you wash a cup.
Don`t forget to turn your clocks back today if you want them to be set to the wrong time.
The Australian kiss is just like the French kiss but down under.
I never wanted to grow up, I just wanted to be tall enough to reach the cookies.
No matter what life brings you, always take a lesson from your dog.. Kick some grass over that s**t and move on.
I just lost another hour trying to figure out how to reset the clock in my car.
The correct answer to "How are you?" is "Fine." If you ever stray from that dialogue, please know that nobody gives a sh!t.
Answering your cell when you don`t recognize the number is like picking up a hitchhiker.
I`m at my most popular when I just want to be alone.
Sometimes the fact that bacon exists is enough.
I`m trying to be healthy and grow my own food but I can`t find any Twinkie seeds.
Like a good neighbor,I don`t really care.
I always thought I looked like romeo, until I washed the picture off my mirror...