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Definition: Brain - Your body`s hardest working organ. It works 24 hours a day, 365 days a year, from birth until you...fall in love.
I`m not Unemployed, I`m just taking my next job`s vacation in advance...
The part of "no" that I don´t understand is the part where I don´t get what I want
For parents of small children, weekends are about as relaxing as showering with cats.
Not All Of The `Goodbyes` Are Sad (eg. * Goodbye School * Goodbye Work)
Who decided that the abbreviation for pound should be two letters not in the word?
My therapist says I am too preoccupied by vengeance.... We`ll see about that.
I`m that friend that you have to explain to people before you introduce me and apologize about afterwards.
I want it all and I want it delivered.
Don`t Follow Me, I`m Lost Too
Do you have neighbors?.. Do you have extension cords?..... Are you paying too much for electricity?
Horse racing is like NASCAR only slower and with poop.
When you introduce clapping to your dancing you might probably be too old to be in a night club at 1am.
Want your favorite song to become your least favorite song? Just make it your alarm tune.
At least a stalker is there for you.