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Your life must really suck when no one even likes the catfish version of you.
They might want to put a picture of that airplane on a milk carton.
Do I have to wake up? I just woke up yesterday.
“Wow! My political opinion just changed because of what you posted on Facebook” – said no one ever.
I try to live my life by the saying: “You scratch my back and I’ll let you know when to stop.”
I wonder if clouds ever look down on us and say "Hey look. That one is shaped like an idiot
When I go running, I usually meet new people..... like paramedics.
Be careful when you follow the masses. Sometimes the “M” is silent.
Can you imagine how sexy I`d be if I ate right and took care of my body... I`m not going to, but can you imagine
Social media is great if you like socializing without wearing pants.
If you people knew how expensive, time consuming and hard this stalking stuff is you wouldn`t freak out every time you see me in your bushes.....geesh
People who eat grapes are impatient alcoholics
There is a gym called Anytime Fitness. I choose 2030.
A guide to hating people. Step 1: get to know them.
Putting ketchup on steak should also affect your credit score.