Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
Spiders are the only web developers that are happy to find bugs.
It takes a brave man to admit when his wife is wrong .
My brain is giving me the silent treatment today.
I’m old enough to know what’s bad for me and young enough to do it.
The world would be a better place if we all got along like the "Price is Right" audience.
I spent yesterday painting some kickass flames on a car. I bet whoever owns it was stoked when they came out of the mall.
It’s what people don’t know about each other that makes them such good friends.
Understanding women number 476,395: Women like to talk about their feelings.
Candy Crushers keep inboxing me saying that they need "lives" as if I didn`t already know that.
I don`t have dirty mind ...I just hav a sexy imagination. ..
There`s nothing more terrifying than accidentally making eye contact with a mall kiosk worker.
All of my plans for the future start out with “when I get rich”
I have no idea what swag is, but I`m fairly certain what I have is the opposite of whatever it is.
People go to the bar hoping for 2 things...to get hammered or to get nailed.
No one on Earth has a higher tolerance to cold temperatures than someone who wants to smoke a cigarette.