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Huge spoiler here ... Did you know Dave is actually NOT the real father of Alvin, Simon, and Theodore.
The problem with frozen yogurt is that it`s not ice cream.
When I was a kid they didn`t call it "Behavioral Disorders", They called it "Being a little brat".
If I was rich, I`d do nothing all day from a much nicer couch
I hate it when you follow your dreams and wind up in a dumpster in the back ally of an IHOP.
I don’t trust joggers, it’s a little too convenient that they are always the ones to discover dead bodies.
I think...therefore, I am.....single
just realised SATURDAY has the word TURD in it
I didn’t scream out someone else’s name during sex. I was thinking of baby names in case you get pregnant…
You`re single? BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.. Yea me too.
When I was a kid, I wanted to be a Pilot...but apparently I was too young.
I miss the good old days..when you could slam the phone down.!!
Life`s short ... Drink fast
I`m trying to be healthy and grow my own food but I can`t find any Twinkie seeds.
Get Dora and Boots on this missing plane case now, Dora solves the case everytime