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The voices in my head tell me not to listen to the voices in my head, and now I don`t know who to listen to anymore
Im at a beer tasting today..so far they all taste the same out of this case...well done Budweiser...well done!!
When you write misspelled backwards it`s misspelled.
is actually feeling pretty much okay about not accomplishing anything this year.
No matter what the product, a good way to throw off an aggressive salesman is to interrupt him and ask, “Yes, but does it work on cats?”
If you think about it,, Batman was pretty lazy about naming all his stuff.
A psychologist is selling a video that teaches you how to test your dog’s IQ. Here’s how it works: If you spend $12.99 for the video, your dog is smarter than you.
My dream job is a pharmacy cashier & yelling for a price check every time someone checks out anal ointment, condoms, & men buying maxi pads.
"Paypal me your lunch money!" -Cyber Bullies
Whenever I tell the cashier to ‘keep the change`, it takes everything in my power not to call them a filthy animal.
Meanwhile one million men got to enjoy a quiet afternoon at home without anyone nagging them.
I saw my ex girlfriend broken down with two flat tires this morning which made me late for work... Nine times I drove past before she noticed me laughing at her.
I would unblock you but then I`d be admitting I`d made a mistake and that`s just not my thing.
You know you are desperate for an answer when you look at the second page of Google.
I may be stupid but im also dumb! :D