Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
OH NO !,,,,,,,,, I just realized I can`t stop calling the addiction hotline....
I`m an adult. I can eat a cupcake for breakfast & call it a muffin if I want
"Why haven`t you been answering my pigeons?" -- Girlfriends in the 17th century probably
Survival rule #1: You go first.
50% of people believe s@x is "the connecting of two people`s souls through two people`s bodies, as one." The other 50% are guys
I’m not fat... my stomach is 3D.
It`s a good thing Taylor Swift and Adele aren`t dating. Imagine if they broke up.
More funny statuses will be posted here soon
"When I grow up, I want to marry a man addicted to video games" ~ No woman ever.
My therapist doesn`t believe in werewolves so I left my last session with more problems than when I arrived.
We’re all mature until somebody brings out the bubble-wrap.
Hey babe, go to Google Earth, zoom in on your house. See that blue cap in the bushes? Hi!
School was so much easier when 2 plus 2 equaled 4 instead of "X." Whoever decided to involve the alphabet in math deserves a solid punch to the face.
Sometimes I wish my dog could talk…then I remember all the things he has seen me do when I’m alone.
Starting a sentence with “If you ask me” almost always indicates that no one asked you.