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If you take Viagra with iron supplements it will cause you spin around and point North.
As an adult, I use nunchucks way less than I expected.
I wouldn’t have to manage my anger, if people could learn to manage their stupidity.
i think lady gaga puts glue on herself, and rolls around random items.
Sunglasses: I don’t want to make awkward eye contact with certain people.
I`ll bet other dogs must think that poodles belong to some weird religious cult.
It`s kill or be killed. Or eat a sandwich. Maybe go for a light jog. Draw a picture of a duck. There are a lot of options out there.
North West? Im confused i thought Kim Kardashian gave birth to a child not a compass
If my week was a YouTube video, Monday would be that crappy ad that doesn`t let you skip.
Sex Ed should require them to listen to a crying baby for 5 hours, and to watch the same episode of a cartoon over and over again.
I declare today, “Hit that dumb person you’ve always wanted to punch in the face day.”
The one who laughs last is the slowest. The one who laughs first has the dirtiest mind.
Screw you, little sticker on fruit!
Just once, I want to see a pregnancy test commercial where the female is like, "Aww, f*ck..."
I ordered an Asian hooker last night. She showed up 2 hours late. She loved me wrong time.