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Ah Friday my second favorite F Word
If you like someone, pretend they`re a charger and you`re an iPhone on 1%. Run to them. Grab them. Plug them in. Wait, I lost the metaphor.
Instead of calling in sick, call in well. Tell them how great you feel not having to go to work today.
You only live once.......Unless someone has a defribrilator
Akward Moment Is When Your Twin Sister Calls You Ugly(:
I love you all so much right now because, well, alcohol.
is in no shape to exercise
If something on this page offends you, please bring it to our attention so we can all laugh at you.
Sometimes I like to hold the door for people who are far away so they feel obligated to run just a little. ;)
My walk of shame is when I have to take all the the empty Taco Bell bags out of my car and bring them to the garbage can.
there`s only 2 things in life you have control in changing that is your attitude and a kids diaper.. which at times both can be the equivalent of the other..
My New Years Resolution is to be more positive and less sarcastic...I wonder how long this bull$hit fantasy will last.
Pretty soon you`ll be able to get married online, instead of saying "I do" you will have to click "I agree to these terms and conditions."
A sheep spends it`s entire life fearing the wolf only to be eaten by the Shepherd.
Now that cell phones are becoming more and more waterproof, pretty soon it will be okay to push people into pools again...