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As you Mature... you learn that you cannot make someone love you.. All you can do is stalk them and hope they panic and give in..
Based on the sound of her walking.. My upstairs neighbor seems like the kind of woman that starts sentences with; "Fee-Fi-Fo-Fum.".. O_o
I decided to go on a road trip and not come back till I ran out of money... I made it to the end of the driveway.
Watching a funny movie after watching a scary one too try to reduce the risk of nightmares.
Falling in love is like watching a sexy person eat hot, crispy bacon and wanting to eat some, too. Marriage is like listening to them chew.
How to break up with someone: You: Your ex is attractive. Partner: Which one? You: ME. You: BYEEEE
You are intriguing. You require further stalking, sorry I mean investigation.
Did you hear that? That was the sound of soccer being irrelevant in the US for another 4 years..
If it’s the thought that counts, then I should probably be in jail…
If every porkshop was perfect, we wouldn`t have hot dogs.
Excuse me but which level of Hell is this?
If I had three wishes, I`d use one for boobs. Because I`m pretty sure I could get everything else that I wanted if I had boobs.
If owls are so smart, how come they don`t say "Whom"?
Four words that I never want to hear: There is no food
Are you always this stupid or is today a special occasion?