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We laughed, we cried, we tried another credit card.
Either I need to up my dosage or my income.
I believe pizza delivery cars should be allowed to use sirens
The average person farts 14 times a day. Finally, I`m above average at something!
Guess what`s brown and sticky... a stick.
Anybody know where the cheapest place to buy 12 red roses is?.....just asking for a friend.
If video games have taught me anything, it’s that if you encounter enemies then you’re going the right way.
I could of sworn my pillow`s a hairdreeser...coz I always wake up with the craziest hairstyles!! :D
It`s all sh*ts and giggles till somebody giggles and sh*ts
Don’t judge me until you’ve walked a mile with my shoes….shoved up your a$$.
Waldo’s mom must be worried sick.
Turns out indoor stone throwing is a mistake no matter what your house is made of.
Just started a new exercise program where I put on a gorilla mask and chase a random toddler through Costco.
One fun way to describe Facebook is “imagine you are a mind reader in Walmart.”
Printing an expiration date on a bag of Cheetos is just a waste of ink.