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Sometimes Google should just come back with a message that says "trust me, you don`t want to know."
After listening to what some people have to say, I am rethinking the importance this whole freedom of speech thing.
Going to McDonalds for a salad is like going to a prostitute for a hug.
It is only when you see a mosquito landing on your testicles that you realise that there is always a way to solve problems without violence
Gonna start a new job tomorow at a archaelogical site, I know I`m gonna dig it.
When I think of you I touch myself ... On my temples ... You give me a migraine.
I`m sorry but, I could not hear you over the sound of my internal hope that you would shut the f*ck up.
Wanna try something funny? Go to a bank and yell "NOBODY MOVE..(Scary pause)..I lost a contact lens."
When people say, "You look familiar," i like to reply with, "Do you watch porn?"
Mary had a little lamb,,the midwife fainted
It turns out that playing strip solitaire isn`t nearly as much fun as playing strip poker. Especially at work...
Woke up to my teen cleaning the house for "no reason" and now I have a mystery to solve.
Well another funny thing about this status is, by the time your done reading this, you realize it talks about absolutely nothing and you just wasted your time. Welcome to Facebook.
If you think this week was a drag, wait till you see what happens next week!
I fake my lol`s