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It`s so cute how all the free sandwiches in the fridge at work have little names.
From now on when skinny girls say they`re fat I`m just gonna be like, "Yup" & walk away.
I didn`t text you. Vodka texted you.
I pretend I don`t care but deep down I really still don`t care.
Do not drink and drive.. because there are people out there who text and drive... and they will hit you and it will be your fault !!
I`m glad I know sign language. It`s pretty handy.
Multitasking? I’m not even good at unitasking.
Do they have to play movies so loud at the theatre? I litterally have to scream into my phone.
I always tell the person at the drive-thru that they are so much prettier than I pictured them when I was ordering.
Facebook is like my fridge… I know there is nothing there but I check it every 10 minutes anyways.
Ate too much salad yesterday so I`m going on an Oreos cleanse today.
Every family has a plastic bag full of plastic bags.
Just assume that we aren’t close enough for you to send me a game invites on Facebook.
I hate fake people...especially the ones at the mall advertising clothes in front of the stores
If I say "I don`t know, let me look", I`m really just spinning around in my chair a few times while you`re on hold.