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I`ll never understand why the guy that invented braille didn`t just put the dots in the shape of the actual letters.
Yeah, I was dropped as a baby. Into a pool of sheer awesome.
Anyone that tells you money is the root of all evil is f*cking broke.
It`s Friday the 13th. Good thing I`m not superstitious, it`s unlucky to be superstitious...
Home sounds like a nice place, until they say they’re going to put you in one.
My Ex texted me."please delete my number."I replied,"Who`s this??"
WTF, I feel like I pay these bills every month.
ok ladies quick question?,say a guy wanted to wear a thong does he tuck shirt in or out? Asking for a friend.
I am not particularly bad at cooking but how long is pasta supposed to stay in the toaster ?
I live like I type, fast and with lots of mistakes!
As I rise from my slumber the children scream in horror, as they did not know I was in the McDonald`s Playland ball pit
People were shocked when they found I wasn`t a good electrician. :-)
Meanwhile on Facebook someone has made a casserole
Im really not just some idiot with nothing better to do with my time, I just play one in FB.
Know what? If they had Neosporin back in 1931, that nasty scar on Frankenstein`s forehead would have been far less noticeable.