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This complimentary lemonade at the doctor`s office tastes funny.
Oh, I have an idea!!..oh wait, no I don`t
Just in: Chinese people confirm they were just messing with us with chopsticks. "You guys look like dumb idiots lol" says one Chinese guy
Why is maple syrup so expensive?.. It grows on trees doesn`t it?
Ninja Mode is not a plausible excuse for not being seen at work.
I think about hiring a maid way too often for someone who has plenty of time to clean.
I spend more time looking in the fridge than I actually do eating.
Being a camera must be pretty cool. You get to sleep until there`s something cool to see.
Keep it down kids!.. Daddy is trying to think of something stupid to say on the internet.
"Omg. Why does this store have so many naked pictures of me?"... "Sir those are mirrors, and we`re gonna have to ask you to leave."
Admit it, we’ve all hidden our favorite food from the rest of our family.
My relationship is like an iPhone, I don`t have an iPhone.
Christmas is over. We now return to our regularly scheduled self centered lives already in progress.
I can paint the house and buy new furniture and my kids won`t notice, but, buy a new phone case...
So far this is the oldest I`ve ever been.