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Happy people don`t take long showers.
My doctor said I needed to reduce stress. Great, now I have that to worry about.
"It seemed like a good idea at the time"............................... An often used phrase in a lot of my memories.
I inboxed a girl on Facebook and she never replied. I guess you could say we`re `seen` each other.
I forgot to make a resolution, so I`m pretty much going to just write out everything I did last night and add the word "stop" to the beginning.
If life Sucks, what makes you think death doesn`t Blow??
Dear neighbor mowing your yard this morning, I found my bagpipes for tonight.
Whatever it is ... I didnΒ΄t do it!
I am not as think as you drunk I am
Guys, if a girl invites you upstairs for "coffee," first make sure she has coffee, you don`t want to get up there and there`s no coffee.
I don`t mean to brag, but my posts are enjoyed by well over 20 people worldwide...
If you saw a heat wave, would you wave back?
Today I saw something that reminded me of you. But don`t worry, I flushed and everything went back to normal.
I donβt necessarily believe in karma, but Iβm gonna be extra careful crossing the street after this weekend.
Its all fun and games until someone drinks the beer with the cigarette butts in it..