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No children were harmed in making this status. Ignored perhaps, but certainly not harmed…
Still waiting for a "Where are they now?" episode about the Flintstones
Saw a billboard ad for potato chips that proudly claimed "There`s a lot of pride in every bag!" Hmmm...is "pride" another word for "air"?
I would watch NASCAR if it was more like Mario Kart.
Yes it may sound childish but if it glows in the dark I still get freaking exited.
Thesaurus for sale, brand new, current, modern, original, unused, untapped, fresh, pristine, untouched, mint condition, spotless, untried...
So you constantly feel sorry for yourself and feel the need to tell everyone all about it. I can’t imagine why he left you.
As I slide down this bannister we call life, you, and you alone, are the splinter in my ass
I have a bad habit of laughing at inappropriate moments.
In hell you`re always trying to spread butter that`s too cold.
I have tons of friends! Well i only have one... but she ways a ton!
I hate it when the little voices argue with my imaginary friends.
Ironman and Batman`s only super powers is being super rich and smart really makes Bill Gates a real disappointment.
Remember, time is more powerful than You!!! One tree makes a million matchsticks......But when the time comes........Only 1 match stick is needed to burn a million trees......
My stove top knob reads, LO | 2 | 4 | 6 | 8 | 10 | HI......so what is Med-High, Medium Low?...They just need to lay it out for me in numbers! Like "set stove top to 8." no wait, 9.? Food manufacturerers and stove manufactuerers need to get toghether on this! So let me see,..... (me thinking)....if ten is high...5 is medium that means 7.5..... WAIT!.....low would be 0 so HI would be 12???....WTF!!! forget about simmer!........HEY KIDS! WHO WANTS PIZZA!