Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
Finally did it. 25 inflatable mattresses later and I’ve finally turned my apartment into a bounce castle.
How to get a woman mad in 2 easy steps: 1. Take a picture of her. 2. Don`t show it to her.
April 1st is the absolute worst day to have a heart attack.
Maybe Oscar wouldn`t have been so grouchy if the people on Sesame Street cared about the fact that he`s homeless
If you are stalking me, please keep up, I have a lot of errands today.
They say you are what you eat, though... I don`t recall eating a sexy beast today
My bed and I are in a good relationship, and my alarm clock is so0o jealous...
I was going to change my profile pic to a pumpkin for Halloween, but it didn`t look that much different from my actual head.
WebMD auto dialed an ambulance when I entered my chicken nugget intake.
We didn`t take a video recording of our child`s birth but we have some awesome video of his conception.
I`m so in Debt, I could start a Government.
I`m going to invent a cleaning product that kills .1% of all germs and bacteria. It doesn`t sound very effective, but I`m going to get it placed right next to all the other cleaning products that kill 99.9% of all germs and bacteria.
Sorry, Mr. Homeless Guy, here’s the story. I’m in college. I work part time and I can only support one of our alcohol problems.
What is this World Cup and can I drink from it?
My local news station says it gives us " news when it breaks " ...I want unbroken news!!