Daily Silly Status

Falling in love is lot like dying, you never get to do it enough to become good at it.

This dishwasher sucks. It`s already ruined three of my paper plates.

You don`t look like 200 likes in person

Please: No,No.No-More about how you think relationships should be: we`ve got it , Your Single,,- get off facebook and go take your own expert advise...

I often confuse reptiles and amphibians. Actually, if I`m being brutally honest, they pretty much never know what I`m talking about

I`d like to have a child one day...Two days, tops.

Home sounds like a nice place, until they say they’re going to put you in one.

There’s plenty of fish in the sea… I just suck at fishing.

Pinatas are a great way to teach children that if you repeatedly beat something with a stick, eventually you`ll get what you want.

11th Commandment: Thou shall not gossip about other people’s lives when you are not doing any better yourself.

Here`s a joke for all you mind readers...

They say you are what you eat, though... I don`t recall eating a sexy beast today

I always drink responsibility I make sure that someone is responsible for buying me drinks.

You know what I just realized that in school they teach you not to do what you don`t want to do yet they still give us homework and we get in trouble because we didn`t want to do it ( confused )

The only people without problems are in the cemetery.