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She asked me for time and distance. I guess she wants to calculate velocity.
there are so many scams on the internet now...... Send me $19.95 an I`ll tell you how you can avoid them
If you are naughty go to your room, if you wanna be naughty go to mine :)
Why did you have to take a half naked picture in front of a full length mirror to show off your new haircut?
I went to open a can of Whoop-Ass but it had a child-proof lid.
I spend 60%of my day worrying that I might have mustard on my face or clothing. The other 40% I am eating mustard.
I`ll bet Amish people look forward to Thanksgiving since it`s the only time their clothes look festive.
The only difference between sex and breakfast is sometimes I don`t want breakfast.
I just got a paper cut opening a box of Pop Tarts. There will be no more fancy breakfasts around here.
If you`re not employed by the Secret Service, there is absolutely no reason to have a Bluetooth on your ear.
I asked my wife what women really want, she said attentive lovers. Or maybe she said "a tent of lovers." I wasn`t really listening.
That horrible moment when the TV commercials are so long that you forget what you’re watching…
Sarcasm is a dominant gene in my family.
You know what I just realized that in school they teach you not to do what you don`t want to do yet they still give us homework and we get in trouble because we didn`t want to do it ( confused )
I do what I want, when I want, where I want.. if my mom says its ok. :)