Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
I just called. To say. I texted you.
The covers of this book are too far apart.
I just want to buy an old Mercedes Benz,so people will think I have been rich for a long time.
Well...today is the day. Just gotta build up the nerve to tell my dog she is adopted.
I`ll decide whether it`s a compliment or sexual harassment.
Law and Order is just Blue`s Clues for adults.
They might as well put "Uhhh..." in front of every item on drive-thru menus.
It`s about time the government enacted a law that keeps dumb and stupid people away from playing any role in society.
Go buy a burrito, leave it in your fridge, get drunk, come home and be your own best secret admirer.
You know you`re all grown up when you actually pick up the ice cube instead of kick it under the fridge.
Have you ever wondered about the look on someone`s face if you hide under their bed and grab their foot in the middle of the night? Just something to think about.....goodnight!
A new day : the possibilities, endless. the funds, insufficient.
You`re pretty cocky for someone with such a small ... vocabulary.
Step 1 Change your wifi password to blowmefirst. Step 2 Wait for someone to ask for your wifi password.
I don`t think I have enough money to find long everlasting love.