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Ain’t no sandwich when she’s gone.
It is hard to imagine how people showed their anger before doors were invented.
I dont want to sound like a badass or anything but I play Wii without the wrist strap on....
Don`t give me a sec, give me lots of secs.
Game of Thrones characters should have to wear jerseys with their names on the back
I wonder how long I`d be on hold if my call wasn`t important to them.
I believe in helping the homeless. That`s why every year I buy a new refrigerator and throw away the box.
When I`m happy, I drink and when I drink, I`m happy. Win/Win!!
Raise your hand if you have already spent your daylight savings
Netflix is a lot like facebook in the way I just waste time scrolling and scoffing at things.
Daylight Savings makes us lose an hour... It’s kind of like Facebook.
Its national shave your... Well, tomorrow is valentine`s day. Just an FYI.
I`m tired of people assuming I`ve got a good personality because I`m ugly.
Irony. The opposite of wrinkly.
If there`s anything I`ve learned in my 27 years, it`s to never admit your real age.