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The most common name In China is Chang, correct me if you think it’s Wong.
You know something bad is about to happen when someone says "Hold my beer and watch this."
When I want to trim down my friend`s Facebook list I give my opinion and let nature do the rest.
I have been left unsupervised yet again. This usually leads to trouble & other bad things, please have bail money ready and keep your phone on.
If we learned anything from the Mayans, it’s that if you don’t finish something, it’s not the end of the world
House cleaning would go a lot faster if the spray bottles made laser gun sounds
the real full form of M.B.A....Married But Available
To save time, lets just assume I am never wrong ;)
Do you ever wake up and kiss someone next to you and appreciate being alive? I did this and was chased out of the bus
It was the best of times, it was the worst of times. -Me with beer, me without beer
Hey ladies! Great news! Those low riding, butt crack, hip hugger jeans are coming back in style!
Two things that most people want. 1. Lose weight 2. Eat
There`s not much more gratifying than seeing a chick who thinks she`s super hot trip on her high heels.
It`s not a real hangover until you bring a pillow into the bathroom.