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Do you think they still give out chips in Gambler`s Anonymous?
" a fool and his money ----- are never around when you need a loan......"
Admit it at some point in your life you have tried to close the fridge slowly to see when the light goes out...
Facebook: Saving us money on birthday cards since 2004
I used to eat a lot of natural foods until I learned that most people die of natural causes...
I can`t get the cork off my dinner.
I`ll do whatever it takes to be the mistake you can`t live without
Wish I turned into a wolf every month instead of getting my period
Rabbits jump and they live for 8 years. Dogs run and they live for 15 years. Turtles do nothing and they live for 150 years. Lesson learned.
Fire at will! Oh, it`s you, Bob! Fire at Bob!"
I don`t trust stairs. They always look like they`re up to something.
I read in a book somewhere that we only use 12% of our brains....I wonder what the other half is for?
My wife complains about everything I do. It`s like she doesn`t know there are "Sexy singles in my area" that want to meet with me.
I`m not real excited that the wrapping on my toilet paper said `100% Recycled`.
Dear whoever ate my fries while i was in the ball pit at McDonald`s... grow up!!