Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
If it’s called tourist season, why can’t you shoot at them?
I just gave my ex a big hug which can only mean one thing. That`s right I have the flu and I love sharing.
Didn`t ya`ll know awkward moments existed before? Damn, its like the Yolocaust all over again...
Do Starbucks employees take coffee breaks?
Wives are just security guards hellbent on denying you access to your happiness, and porn collection.
It’s not that I don’t want kids, it’s just that I don’t want a minivan.
Just saw Abe Lincoln Vampire Hunter... So that`s how it happened! I knew what I learned in history class was a bunch of crap!
If the world dosen`t end on the 21st, I sure do have a lot of MREs to gift wrap.
I don`t get why people find drunk text annoying
I hope I’m the last guy on earth — I wanna see if all those women were lying to me.
Nobody cleans a house faster than a man expecting to get laid.
Question everything...Or should you?
Nothing says " My divorce didn`t go as planned " quite like the guy with grocery bags hanging on the sides of his bicycles handlebars
Hey, chicks who have words tattooed on your tits... We didn`t come here to read.
Dear whoever ate my fries while i was in the ball pit at McDonald`s... grow up!!