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The first rule of selfie club should be to clean your room.
If you raise your children, you spoil your grandkids. If you spoil your children, you raise your grandkids.
India launched a rocket to Mars yesterday… That’s a heck of a place to put a call center.
It`s not stretching if it doesn`t involve crazy dinosaur noises.
Had a blast doing my Black Friday tradition!!!! I slept!
My dream job would be the Karma delivery service
Forecast for tonight: Dark.
Everyone always talks about the early bird. How about the early worm? How´d that work out for him?
There’s really no reason to repeat yourself. I ignored you just fine the first time.
Looks don’t matter to me if you’re attractive.
If we ever travel thousands of light years to a planet inhabited by intelligent life, let’s just make patterns in their crops and leave.
Let’s be the generation that stops putting things in our butts and having to go to the emergency room to get them taken out, shall we?
That depressing moment when you dip your cookie into milk for too long, it breaks off, and you wonder why bad things happen to good people.
I’ve found that I can usually judge how hot a woman is by how many times my girlfriend calls her a whore.
This book on marriage says treat your wife like you treated her on the first date, so after dinner tonight I am dropping her off at her parents` house