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finally got my certification in the mail, I`m officially insane.
What`s it called when you always have a sweet tooth, but it`s only for booze?
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If you got up this morning and ran straight to fb i am 100% POSITIVE its because you missed me.
Never assume coz u wil make an "ass" out of "u" and "me"
I stick pins and needles in the people I don`t like because can`t afford voodoo dolls.
Nothing tests that whole "for better or worse" thing like the question "does this look infected?"
I don’t even know what I don’t know.
Exercise makes you look and feel better naked ... But, so does Tequila
Well, all I have to say is TGIF. (Post this on any day but Friday to get comments)
one day a man seen a fairy, and asked.... could you make me irresistible to all women.... so she turned him into a credit card. :`D
Beer: Giving you the courage to talk to women but taking away the ability to make sense.
No one your age has any idea what they`re doing either. No matter what age you are.
The reason why women will never be the ones to propose is because as soon as she gets on her knees, he will start unzipping his pants
Life is like a bowl of soup; you only get blown if you’re hot.