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Next time a stranger talks to me when I`m alone, I will look at them shocked and whisper quietly...."You can see me???"
I tend to say βI dont knowβ when Iβm too lazy to think.
I don`t remember anything that happened, but I may have had a drink or two...
These police take Hide and Seek really seriously.
Life was much easier when apples and blackberries were fruits&& not phones
I fail to understand the βgoodβ part of βgood morningβ
Iβm a lonely Status. I wish more people liked me.
Whatβs the answer to this question?
I`d like to help you out. Which way did you come in?
I don`t know why the Petco cashier gave me this look when I asked for the fish`s Birth date.
You are more likely to be bitten by a person who believes they are a shark than an actual shark.
I love the gym this time of year. The newbies make me look like a Victoria Secret model.
I`m going to the gym now. Not bragging. Just want you to know where to send the ambulance.
Every time I get an eyelash in my eye, I`m reminded of how quickly I would die in the wild.
This is my leftover status from Thanksgiving.