Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
Dieting is for the birds. Which is why you hardly ever see a fat bird.
If you don`t have anything nice to say I would probably enjoy spending time with you
It’s not that I’m old, your music really does suck.
Groundhog Day, Just walked outside and saw my shadow, It`s now official, Six more weeks of dieting :/
A fun way to give your man a little scare is to ask him, "Do you know what tomorrow is?" and watch the panic set in.
My three biggest fears are mouses, wolfs & proper pluralization.
"I am upping my standards... so up yours!"
I shurvivfed the dentisht wivout any notishable shide affecshss.
You can`t make someone love you. All you can do is stalk them & hope they panic & give in.
The internet is just another location for people to be wrong about things.
Some people are such treasures that you really just wanna bury them.
All fortune cookies should just read, "You will have diarrhea for the next 24 hours.
Pulling out a winter coat and going through the pockets to find out who I was 8 months ago.
If Jesus was the son of Mary and he was the Lamb of God, Does that mean Mary had a Little Lamb?
The important thing to remember is that nobody asked you.