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I decided to go on a road trip and not come back till I ran out of money... I made it to the end of the driveway.
It`s a beautiful day, think I`ll skip my meds and stir things up a bit.
Please don`t hastag out loud...
If you’re a size 0 we shouldn’t be able to see you.
The way I see it, every Friday is Good Friday.
Adding "and sh!t" to the end of a sentence to make it sound cooler and sh!t.
Do they have to play movies so loud at the theatre? I litterally have to scream into my phone.
Putting your finger on someone`s lips and saying "Shhhh... Not another word." is super-romantic. But the cop didn`t think so.
Experience is what you get, when you don`t get what you want
I’m pretty sure I could start a new life with only the crap in my car.
scratch here ¦¦¦¦¦¦¦¦¦¦¦¦¦¦ to reveal my status
I would of read and liked your status if it wasn`t like 3 pages long.
I just quit my job at the helium bottling plant. I refuse to be spoken to in that tone!
A company has announced a new service where you carpool with strangers. It`s a new cutting-edge technology called "taking the bus."
If you’re a douchebag, it’s so easy to find the right hat.