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Say what you want about Kim and Kanye naming their daughter North West. That kid is headed straight to the top. And slightly to the left.
Half the journey is knowing where you’re parked.
"Please don`t put a million dumb photos of me on your Facebook... it just annoys your friends" - Every baby
really vry funny
I would exercise, but then all the sprinkles would fall off my cupcake.
Sometimes I just go to work for the free internet.
I`m not crazy, I`m just special!!...No, wait...Maybe I am crazy. One second...I have to talk to myself about this, hold on...
11th Commandment: Thou shall not gossip about other people’s lives when you are not doing any better yourself.
Some people come into our lives & leave footprints on our hearts. Others come into our lives & make us wanna leave footprints on their face...
I hate being bi-polar. It`s awesome.
When I order pizza online and there’s a “Notes” box I put “Ring bell, Cross moat, SLAY DRAGON”
The only solution to a problem is to find the source and Kill it.
Day Light savings this weekend is pissing me off, we will lose a hour we will never get back...........wait...thinkin`.....I guess we do....carry on...
Now that cell phones are becoming more and more waterproof, pretty soon it will be okay to push people into pools again...
Carrots may be good for your eyes, but alcohol will double your vision.