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Not to cause a panic but i`m starting to think we`re running out of things to stuff inside pizza crust.
That logical moment when you`re watching Home Alone 2 wondering how child services haven`t taken him away from his parents yet.
i just accidentally used AOL online, im betting the workers there are celebrating and think they have a chance in the future. lol
The only candy I crush are empty cold ones.
Don`t forget to get offended today by some retarded sh!t that has absolutely no bearing on your life whatsoever.
I bet the guy who invented fake dog poo was upset the name "shampoo" was taken
The only difference between a weekday and a weekend is which boss is telling me to do things.
Patience Is When Playing TETRIS And U Let Those Bricks Fall On Their Own Without Speeding Them Down
There`s a big difference between a mechanic and a surgeon when they work on a tranny.
I can`t wait to be ashamed of what I do this weekend
Walmart does not have a dildo section. But it`s always fun to ask their employees if they do.
I just realized that I haven`t done the "Hockey Pokey" in over 10 years. I guess when you get older, you just forget what it`s all about.
A stress ball, made of concrete, and to throw at the person who`s stressing you out.
The best time to re-examine your life is when you find yourself reluctantly nodding to the questions asked at the start of an infomercial.
I love food, napping on the couch, and getting super excited about car rides, I`m basically a golden retriever.