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My dog acts like his entire family was murdered by a vacuum cleaner.
Have some fun with your life...call in sick to places you dont even work at.
Ladies - I am still available as a great last minute Christmas gift!
I thought about going outside and doing something today but my Wi-Fi really doesn`t reach very far.
Note to self: Next time, don`t use "continue" as the Safe Word.
Someone told me I`m immature and need to grow up. Guess who`s not allowed in my treehouse now.
I´ll never be old enough to know better.
Whenever I move into a new neighborhood, the first thing I familiarize myself with is the liquor store coz you know priorities.
Thanks to Facebook, rock bottom now has a waiting list.
When you think about it, the little old man behind the curtain in Oz was the original catfish.
I’m beginning to think that for some of you, the wheels on your bus do not go round & round.
I watched my first porn movie today. I looked so much younger back then...
At this stage of my life, "Good in Bed" means not snoring or stealing the covers.
Christmas time always make me blue :-(( and then red, then green, then oh wow.. presents...