Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
I don`t think my blind date was blind, she read the menu and caught the basketball I threw at her
Just realized the laundry detergent has been in the refrigerator for 3 days, in case you`re looking for a business manager.
If I ran the country, things would be a lot better. Well…for me anyway.
9 out of 10 doctors will agree that 1 out of 10 doctors is an idiot.
7,000 people were treated in emergency rooms for injuries sustained from fireworks. Don’t be a statistic, let your friend light the fuse
Every so often I’ll listen to my wife talk non stop for hours at a time, to remind myself why people wander into traffic without looking.
Just as I predicted, today was in fact a new day!
To the teenager that flipped me off for honking at you. Your phone is on top of your car.
Fire at will! Oh, it`s you, Bob! Fire at Bob!"
We would like to thank everyone that submits statuses to the site. Many get rejected because we don`t think they are funny, or they are unreadable, or they are to inappropriate and offensive.
Sometimes I can`t figure out if I`m in pre-school... high school.. oh wait, I`m at work.
This is not meant for you. Look away. STOP LOOKING AT IT! :)
B!tches be trippin ... OK, maybe I pushed one.
Whenever I fill out a job application with a box for "Race," I add a question mark and then write, "Anytime. Anywhere."
Why is it all the good things in life are either illegal, immoral, impossible, addictive, or fattening?