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A hole has been found in the nudist camp wall. The police are looking into it.
According to national reports, car thefts in the US are now at a 20 year low...Well, sure, it`s hard to steal a car when the owner`s living in it...
There’s a wild side to EVERY innocent face.
On the subject of sex, my parents told me `the man goes on top, and the woman underneath.` No wonder I got divorced. For 3 years my ex-wife and I slept in bunk beds.
Sorry, I`m in a hurry, lets talk while we walk... You go that way.
New Years - the only day where its socially acceptable to drink this early.
Don`t do drugs. Become a Pop star and they give `em to you FOR FREE!
I`m so hot I stalk myself ;)
I`d share my Netflix login but I`m too embarrassed by "My List".
In the spirit of spring cleaning and Easter, I`m keeping the dust bunnies as decorations.
Is snaxting a thing? Texting each other pics of your snacks? Cause I feel like I’d be pretty good at that.
If A Couple in Love are called Love Birds, then a couple who fight with each other should be called Angry Birds.
The most effective way to torture young people is to make them watch old people use a computer.
I would just like to personal thank all the people in my life that have caused me so many problems, for making me the as$ I am today!
On a scale of 1-10, I give this day a middle finger.