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Still waiting for a "Where are they now?" episode about the Flintstones
What sort of drug abuse and debauchery has to occur in someone`s life for them to start liking Charmin Toilet Paper on Facebook?
Billy Ray Cyrus made a million dollars at a playgirl photo shoot. He just started taking his clothes off and they paid him to put them back on.
Thank you Lord for this delicious meal we are about to Instagram.
Let`s start by taking some notes today. I`m fabulous bitches! Write that down.
If a bra is called an `Over the shoulder bolder holder,` then would you call men`s underwear `Under the butt nut hut?`
If love is blind....why is lingerie so popular?
Everyone knows spray tans and Tang come from the same stem cells as Cheetos, so why does Wikipedia keep deleting my edits?
When people stay in a horrific relationship instead of breaking up, I assume they killed someone together.
Engineers: "okay, so we agree the space between the seat and the console will allow people to see what they dropped but never retrieve it"
anyone celebrating anything today? Anything at all... doesn`t matter what. I just need something to drink to.
The problem with marriage is that it was invented when people lived to the ripe old age of 30.
Sometimes it’s just better to buy new Tupperware than to risk opening the leftovers.
Make yourself indispensable at work by hiding everything.
If a girl picks an iron in monopoly you know she`s a keeper